Murdering Thoughts

This is a blog that I will never publicise in anyway, if you happen to stumble upon this your in luck because we may have some things in common and you may enjoy what you read here or it may be unfortunate for you because you will read something that may either scare you or not be to your taste.In any case these are my thoughts and fingers move faster than a pen might so this is why they are online.

I used to think I'm special, I used to think that something I can do was something special and no one can do it as good as me, but lately I'm starting to think I'm kidding myself because I look around and I see so many people younger than that can do the same thing and those around them think oh that is so interesting you are so smart or I think is more the other way around, what I used to do best now becomes normal something that anyone can do easily, well I think that is a misconception because you can't tell from one encounter or two how good that person is at doing that thing.As you can see I'm avoiding saying what I'm good at or at least think so, because to most it may seem stupid or like I said before, normal, but when I was young it made me special it made me interesting, now I feel like a wash out , the world is moving faster than I can comprehend it.Are you special when you have to WORK for what would apparently make you special?I'm not saying it's something wrong in working, it's just that to be special is to be born special, to have a talent which later on you can develop but how can someone do that when that someone wasn t even given a chance?I don't want to be average, I don't want to be that kind of person of whom people say "Oh he lived a good life, he was quiet, kept to himself, had a nice family, bla bla bla , AVERAGE!!!!!!!" I wanna be someone that people can think of and wonder and say " Oh wow yea him, of course I remember him, awesome guy, crazy dude , fun guy" I guess I really want to be known to be remembered for years to come, but I'm guessing those kind of people are born one in a million and I wasn't in that one million.Still...